Shit on the carpet
People ask me ALL THE TIME what our everyday life is like. Since the last 24 hours were nothing short of entertaining, I'll give you a glance.
So yesterday afternoon, I'm sitting on the screen in porch pumping with the twins out there too. Simms was taking a nap upstairs. Vance cruises down the couch toward me and I realize a TICK is crawling down his arm AND he has a blowout coming up his back. I immediately slap his hand to knock it off onto the couch. Of course, he thinks he's in trouble and starts sobbing. His crying interests Ellis to come over and see what all the fuss is about. So now all the kids are on top of me and all my pumping cords while a tick is crawling beside us that I CANNOT LOOSE SIGHT OF or it will be forever stuck in our screened in porch and I'll never want to be out there again. I decide it's better if I just stop pumping mid pump because I can't handle the stress of watching this tick. I take "pumping" (as simms calls it) off and drag the twins in the house. I grab a cup and run back out praying the tick is still in plain sight. It is. I sweep it into the cup and flush it down the toilet.
Since I knew the babies hadn't been even outside yet today, I knew the tick had to have been on the screened in porch. So now it's operation clean the porch time. I grab the vacuum and clean every surface out there. I realize when I'm done that the vacuum is full and I need to go dump it. The babies are still out back on the porch. So I run it out the front door to dump it in the garbage outside. While I'm dumping it, I hear babbles McGee (Vance) come out. He's sitting on the front porch talking up a storm. I told him to go back inside and he does. I walked in right behind him and closed the door. Simms is walking down the stairs now asking what all the commotion was. I told him and said I had to go change Vances blowout now. So I take Vance over to the changing table and am dealing with all that mess. Simms said "where's Ellis?" UMMMM SHIT. WHERE IS ELLIS?!? I call his name and look around and he's no where. I ask Simms if he saw him go upstairs and he says no. Suddenly I see Ellis beating outside in the front door with both hands while he screams. That's right, I had locked Ellis outside. Never even knew he went out!!!! I am officially one of those people from the news that has no idea how their kid wondered off. Mom of the year. Ellis is walking more now and I guess I just never heard him sneak out!
Fast forward to bath time. Every night I take a bath with the kids because it's easier and faster. Plus they loved it way more than being alone in a bath as newborns. So we have an assembly line that we do every night. Simms has really gotten into taking his own clothes off for the bath and I saw him start doing that after I was already in the bath. I quit paying attention and start washing my face. Then I hear a ton of screaming. Most of it coming from cal and cal doesn't scream ever. All the sudden he brings Simms in and he's shaking his so mad. Cal truly never gets mad. He yells "Simms just got shit all over the carpet, his shoes, and the rug!!!!" He had apparently pushed his diaper down around his ankles and stomped it off. Just kill me.
3 boys in one year is NOT A JOKE.
